Starved

This one is heavy.  It will weigh on the mind. 

I have to stamp something physically with my thoughts.  There are many happy and sweet things inside of me right now.  I have enjoyed a lovely time spent with family and friends in the past days and I would love to express those feelings in an entry.  Now, here comes the lingering BUT.

 But, there is an image my eyes rested on and in no more time than it took the optic nerves to send the image to my brain, where deduction of meaning and reaction of emotion and all that stuff that happens in our magical brains that makes us creations and creators, I had a painful feeling in my core.  It is a manipulated image.  A graphic designer has taken liberty to create a stark portrait of reality.  And it is not abstract.  It is not even imagined.  It is simply a view from a distance.  It is a truth.

 It (and some other images and words) was sent to me via email and then I was asked by text “What did you think about that?” My words in reaction to this image (and the others):

“They were disgusting, sad, pathetic, devastating, repulsive, shameful, appalling, degrading, loathsome, grotesque, sickening, glutinous, and worst of all true.”

They responded, “So what are you trying to say?”  The joke with my friends is that I really need to learn how to form an opinion.  But, it would be hard to find any sensitive individual who wouldn’t react the same as I did.

This is such an ugly truth and such an accurate reflection of circumstances that it burns a hole in the pit of the stomach and burrows tightly within the hole, never leaving.  

It is a blessing to have ample food.  It is a blessing to have a selection of food and the ability to feed our bodies properly and with exquisite taste.  We know that.

And this, my friends, is what we have turned that blessing into…

Look around, look in the mirror, look on your plate, and look in your trash can.

Have you ever felt like weeping so much in your recent memory?

The thing that makes this worse is that we have done this and we see this and know this and we CONTINUE to do this.  Let’s just stop.  Let’s be appropriate and decent and respectful to not only our own bodies but for the bodies of the other human beings on Earth that are STARVING to DEATH.  There are people… children… that die, fall over and die, from not having food.  On the other hand, our disgusting society insists on Biggie Fries and we complain like maniacs when too few are in the greasy heap in front of us. 

 There is plenty of healthy food on Earth.  We shouldn’t be the only ones ashamed at our disrespectful behavior.  The criminal corruption that rules Africa’s continent- and other regions- that note and ignore this sort of tragedy should be… well, that’s the point, what could be done to equal this sort of pain and horror?  There is no suitable disciplinary action.  Only Karma comes close and then, still, only negative energy resounds.

I just wish them gone.  I wish the wind would blow the persons and organizations that starve their children to nothing.  I wish them gone and replaced by nurturers and celebrators- defenders- of life. 

That could happen.  They will die.  All people die.  And these insane assholes that hoard food and goods, stock pile foreign aid money, and deprive the citizens of their soil the basic right to eat and live and be happy… they will die.  Please God, replace them with good people that protect life.

If there is ever a time to pray to God for reason and good will to echo so loudly across the lands of this planet that it bursts the drum of ill intent and leaves simple peace and harmony called FED, then this is that time.  We don’t need a miracle; we need mindfulness.  Capability is not without- it is so obviously within us.  Basically, solutions exist.  In my opinion these solutions aren’t going to come from government.  Why?  Because we have government now and they aren’t doing anything about it.  We’ve had government all this time and they haven’t even made progress.  Why would we keep relying on failures grouped together calling themselves “government”?  Sir Isaiah Berlin states in his book The Crooked Timber of Humanity that aiming people and their exhausted efforts toward an unseen goal, one that is never attainable is “a cruel mockery”.  That applies to this idea from my point of view.  This is a mess that governments have contributed to and we are told to keep on trusting they will work toward a solution… yet they have no solution mapped out and they ignore blatant mishandling and they keep saying the same taglines with no results.  It is insulting.  They think we are rats racing toward cheese on a string.  They hold this string and pull, creating a situation that is forever “just within grasp” or “on the horizon”.  I am not quite sure of Alexander Herzen’s entire intent when he wrote these words because I read an excerpt of the essay that contained them- but these particular words are basic, relevant, and make sense: “… a goal which is infinitely remote is no goal, only… a deception.”             

No, I think this solution is going to come from collective agreement within the minds of people all over this planet that this can and will be solved and then simply act in accordance.  That may sound vague and broad.  It is.  That’s the point.  But, what would happen if every consciousness tuned into solving this very solvable matter?  If every person on a boat simply leans to the right, do you think a ripple results?  And that ripple continues on, gaining momentum and energy until all of that displaced water crashes on a shore making an impression. 

In essence we are all on a boat together.  Let’s lean our minds toward what’s right. 

Floating Timber

Ever heard of Isaiah Berlin?

I hadn't.  Then, I browsed the bookstore shelves at the coffeehouse and this book called The Crooked Timber of Humanity almost popped out of the line up and into my hands. I flipped the book over and read the back. I was hooked.  I am still hooked.  I have a crush of massive proportion on this book.

"Aus so krummem Holze, als woraus der Mensch gemacht ist, kann nichts ganz Gerades gezimmert werden."

~ Immanuel Kant

'Out of timber so crooked as that from which man is made nothing entirely straight can be built.'

or in other words

'Out of the crooked timber of humanity no straight thing was ever made.'

You had me at hello.

This is a book I read before bed, carry around with me everywhere I go, make notations in the margins of its pages, and read aloud to Nick at 7 AM.  By the way, it isn't the sort of book to read aloud.  I think he hates it when I do that.  It is a book to pour over.  It is a book you have a personal relationship with and then go and discuss with another who is reading it as well.  I'm handing it to him when I'm done, although I may have separation anxiety.  But, to read the words to him before he heads out the door isn't fair.

Mostly, this book has turned my burning desire for information of its sort into a torch with an eternal flame.  I crave more.  I would love to quote from the page words I have underlined but it is turning into an entirely underlined piece. 

I will give you this underlined portion:

Chapter: The Pursuit of the Ideal, page 13-14

"Happy are those who live under a discipline which they accept without question, who freely obey the orders of leaders, spiritual or temporal, whose word is fully accepted as unbreakable law; or those who have, by their own methods, arrived at clear and unshakeable convictions about what to do and what to be that brook no possible doubt.  I can only say that those who rest on such comfortable beds of dogma are victims of forms of self-induced myopia, blinkers that may make for contentment, but not for understanding of what it is to be human."

How amusing are the words "freely obey"?  That struck me as a very particular choice he made when writing.  I wrote something that in my mind touched on the subject from the same angle.  It is Crumbs for Thought.  I have heard many different interpretations that upon hearing them make me so proud.  It is wonderful to hear people speak to me of what they took from something I wrote and posted.  Especially if it is different than what I intended and prompts us both to discuss the words at length.

    

Before I move on to something else I want to give you the book's information.

The Crooked Timber of Humanity

Chapters in the History of Ideas

Isaiah Berlin

Edited by Henry Hardy

Princeton University Press

Princeton, New Jersey

Back Cover:

"Isaiah Berlin was one of the most important philosophers of the twentieth century- an activist of the intellect who marshaled vast erudition and eloquence in defense of the endangered values of individual liberty and moral and political pluralism. In The Crooked Timber of Humanity he exposes the links between the ideas of the past and the social and political cataclysms of our present century: between Platonic belief in absolute truth and the lure of authoritarianism; between the eighteenth-century reactionary ideologue Joseph de Maistre and twentieth-century Fascism; between the romanticism of Schiller and Byron and the militant- and sometimes genocidal- nationalism that convulses the modern world."

    

Yummy, folks.  This is delicious.

What I find particularly fascinating when researching Isaiah is the distortion of the term Liberalism.  I find the distortion less with Conservatism.  But, for instance, one of the ideas Liberalism embraces and stands for is Capitalism.  It calls for constitutions and in fact is the foundation of thought under the American Revolution because Liberalism opposes Fascism, Communism, and military dictatorship, fighting tyranny fiercely.  So, when you hear a confessed Liberal call for something that resembles any of the above… like an actual call for a dictator or to expand government to absurd proportions… think about how distorted this is to the origin of the political philosophy of Liberalism.

Now, Conservatism as a philosophy or attitude calls for less change, making slow steps toward any new way of life.  They, in principle, favor classes and aristocracy. Here are some excerpts to take note of:

These words are about Edmund Burke and the source is Wikipedia.  Edmund Burke’s relevance:

“In the United States, conservatism developed after the Second World War when Russel Kirk and other writers identified an American conservative tradition based on the ideas of Edmund Burke.”  

“He accepted the liberal ideals of private property and the economics of Adam Smith, but thought that economics should be kept subordinate to the conservative social ethic, that capitalism should be subordinate to the medieval social tradition and that the business class should be subordinate to aristocracy. He insisted on standards of honor derived from the medieval aristocratic tradition, and saw the aristocracy as the nation's natural leaders. That meant limits on the powers of the Crown, since he found the institutions of Parliament to be better informed than commissions appointed by the executive. He favored an established church, but allowed for a degree of religious toleration. Burke justified the social order on the basis of tradition: tradition represented the wisdom of the species and he valued community and social harmony over social reforms.”

Jeepers.

Like I said, I find less distortion with this term than Liberalism because without necessarily knowing it, many Conservatives are standing firm in principles that are in complete alignment with having a class system, allowing only a monitored amount of religious freedom and separation of church and state, and calling for a dominant royal or divine rule.  Even though they claim to be for the middle class, they seem to demand rule from a powerful executive office.  In general I find no mention of checks and balances from Conservatives and especially not from Liberals.

  

Anyway…

These are classical meanings of the two terms.  I find them super interesting.  Think of them and then flip on the tube and hear the people who label themselves one or the other speak about their beliefs.  It is so easy to find and read about.  No book required.  It is all one click away.

This is a boring examination of thoughts stemmed from this book.  It is enthralling and deals with so much more.  It delves into whether man, regardless of culture and time and circumstance, strives for the same end truth, the same ideal way of life or if these truths are incompatible, unable to be compared at all due to a vast difference in value systems.  This is just in the first few pages. And it is a “page turner” in my opinion, very well written and remarkably relevant to today just as it will be tomorrow and just as it was yesterday.  I think he had a timeless mind and interprets it, as his abilities have been described often, with eloquence.

Here’s your song of the day:  

I, again, just recently saw the video.  In my head different images roll during the song.  But it is still a good video and 'speaks' about an issue that I find important, two actually to me because I see a double meaning.  I will keep my own imagined video though.  

I wake up when I do because this song plays loudly in my head.  It seems that it has been chosen as my internal alarm or wake up call.  I wonder every morning, did I choose it?

This is Float On by Modest Mouse.

      

EntertainMe, EntertainMeN(o)t ? This is America's question.

Often I write about music.  I like to write to music so that makes sense.

Today, I'm going to choose just one and share it.  It is a song that can be heard over and over.  I know this.  I have done exactly that today (and many other days).  I have played this one more times than I can count and it is featured on the majority of my playlists... unless, of course, it's a dance mix.

Earlier (February) I spent a lot of time copying names of songs and thoughts about them to a post.  I copied a couple of different playlists that I had burned on a disc for a friend and realized that since no one could hear the song, if they weren't familiar with it, all my comments listed below it would seem abstract.

This is my attempt to make it up to you, little by little, by linking an actual song in my post.  Click and listen and watch the video if you want.  I only saw the video for the first time about 10 minutes ago.  Prior to that, I had a completely different visualization of the song.  So, don't be afraid to close your eyes.

My Nicholas loves this one too and bought it for me.  I like when he buys me music.  It is a passionate gift.

The most played song of my day:

We tried our hardest last night to stomach American Idol.  We didn't watch much of it.  I said, "Nick, let's just see what everybody is talking about."  It isn't that the two people we heard weren't talented, because they seemed to be very much so, but we just couldn't withstand the cheese factor.  It was curdled.  Cottage cheese, in fact.  There is a bit too much manufacturing going on for my taste and for Nick and I both- the crying has got to stop!  Geez people.  Every commercial showcases a sobber. Act like a professional if you want to be one.  Take it like a champ.  You're going to hear yes and you're going to hear no... part of life.  It isn't just a little crying I'm talking about.  People are crying all over the show.  And then the whole mouthing your number while you hold up four fingers as voting instructions are announced and all the while the close up is so tight the screen is filled entirely with contestant four's head.  Barfola. 

The success of the show is apparent.  I am very thankful though that Nick and my television viewing preferences are aligned.  I will cackle so hard at Modern Family that my sides hurt... other than the really captivating sitcom or drama... or let's admit it ANY Family Guy episode... we stick to documentary type shows on the History Channel or Discovery Channel.  And then we'll watch the news just to see what they are covering as opposed to what they leave out.  What they say and don't say.  What they avoid correcting when blatant lies pour out of mouths.  May sound boring, but to us it is top choice.  Oh, I shouldn't leave out House Hunters International.  I like that one too.  Especially when they hunt in Italy.

Okay peeps.  Selma Lu Mela is going nuts behind me with her ball.  I'm going to tickle her silly.  And THIS is actually my number one choice for entertainment.

Honey Come Monday

Blades wave high in the barely lit day.  I look to the horizon.  Blue waters crash on my shore, this is my home.  I roam.  The air blows heavy here.  There is no stillness, not in the ways of my earth.  This harbor rocks and smashes against the flat land.  It expands wide open to match the movement which met its mouth.  The grass bends flat making way for my foot and the bristly bush rustles at my ear.  I like it here.

I am the color of amber.  I say I am like that- a trapped, smoldered fire hidden within a still, compliant rock.  My passion lies dormant.  It is shown only when smashed.  It is what keeps me.  When my body aches or my spirit sags this is what I rely on.  No one knows me yet.

I have this home and share it.  But, they don't see me.  My brother walks two steps ahead.  His taller shoulder above my head.  I follow him for now.  He is young, still learning his ways.  Younger than I is my brother, so I watch out for him from behind.  His black coat absorbs the sunlight.  I watch that happen.  His energy is boundless so I use my smolder.  I tap my trapped fire.  

The people say they own me.  I do not argue.  I need their love and wish for a home in their arms even more than on this land.  But, they do not see me.  They look past my eyes as I search for understanding.  They keep walking.  I try not to cry.  I hear from the trees that this is their way.  The owls say they often see nothing in truth.  

The owl says his wisdom is ancient.  He says it is known far and wide that the owl can see all.  So, I asked the owl, "What do you see here?  Tell what you see for me."

He looked at me, glaring down from the high branch.  I froze, captured in his vision.  He looked at me and I felt he really saw me.  I felt he might be the one who knew me.

"Do you know me, owl?  Is it you?"

This is what he said to me.  "The people, they call you Honey?"

"Yes." I said.  "They say I'm sweet and that I look like the honey from a bee."

"But you, Honey, you can see more than they.  So, believe what you see in yourself.  And do not rely on their words.  Blindness falls on man.  Temptation takes hold.  They cut the tree and burn the land and all they do it for is gold.  What they do not see is truth.  They do not recognize value."

"I see."  I said, looking back into the bright yellow eyes of the owl.

"This time here for you is short.  You must say goodbye soon.  Honey, come Monday, they want you no more.  Do not be so sad.  I fly to the tree that stands by you.  They all are my home.  And when you wish for my words again, cry to me in the light of the moon.  I will speak to you."

I turn away.  I look back at my horizon, where forest breaks way and the flat land meets the water wave and the sky above.  My tears roll and dampen my paw that stands upon my dirt.  They do not see me.  They do not know my worth.

"Please," I said to the above, "give me love." 

I didn't see my brother with black coat for hours in the day.  I had so much to mourn and all he wants to do is play.  I kept to myself, making a bed by my favorite spot.  I thought, "They cannot take me away if they cannot find me.  They only feed my anyway.  My fur is matted and my skin hurts from stuck sand spurs.  They do not hold me.  They do not own me."

It is the next day and I walk to the tall tree and cry out high.  

Owl peeks out at me and says to come back at night.

I wait and worry and again creep through the long grass to the woods and sit by the tall tree.  The moon is bright and I see owl is waiting on me.  

"What is your question, little one?"

"What is the day, owl?  How long do I have?"

Not long at all.  Sunday has come and gone.  Honey, come sun up, they're putting you in the truck."

"No!" I screamed.  "I don't have anywhere else to go.  They might not love me here, but this is all I know."

"The Earth is generous, Honey, and it has much to give.  Look at this as a gift.  You will see another horizon.  You are growing from this."

I turned and ran as fast as I could.  

I cleared the woods and crossed the meadow and came to the water's edge.  

I looked down into the harbor to see my own reflection.  

Tear drops wrinkle the water, but I can still see.  "Do I have the courage?" I wonder.  "Do I have the energy? Will my smolder suffer and give me nothing in return?"  I look at my coat of fur and small fluffy ears.  My brown eyes have lost a lot of twinkle over my few years.  I lick my black nose wet from watering eyes and my purple tongue gives me my first clue.  I am not a bought dog like brother.  I'm a mixture of breeds and don't know from where I come.  This must be why I'm so easy to get rid of.

I sank down low and put my chin to the ground.  

I fell asleep with no passion in my heart.  

I wondered if I'd lost my spark. 

Day break.  My heart aches.

They scoop me up and I can't resist.  This one who took me was a stranger.  My people are nowhere I can see.  They didn't even say goodbye to me.  The stranger has soft hands and says to me that I should have time to say goodbye to my brother.  So, I watch the sun shine on his black coat one last time and I kiss him on the nose.  He kisses me back.  I walk back to the strange man with my head hanging low.  I let him take me from my home.

The journey is not so bad.  This stranger spoke to me.  He spoke to me like the owl in the tree.  I sit beside him in his truck and he looks me in the eye.  

He said, "I don't know why they would give you up.  But, with me you're safe and with me you're loved."  I froze in his vision.  It seemed to me I was seen.

"Is it you?" I thought.  "Are you the one who sees me?"

The strange man puts his hand on me.  He rubs my head between my ears and in his hand is the energy I lacked.  In his hand is my clue. My spirit's smolder is back again, here to keep me warm.  I don't know what land I will have to roam but I know with this man I have a home.  

I thought of the owl high in the tree and wondered if he could see me.  

Then his words came to me.  

"I see all, Honey from a bee.  I am the wisdom your soul seeks.  I will be here every night you need me."

I sigh with relief.  My land I know I will miss but this new spot is becoming a good fit.  When the strange man told me his name he spoke to me like I could hear him and understand his words.  I wished I could say I understood, so I licked his hand and sensed he knew.  

I cross the threshold for the first time without receiving a scold.  I am taken into a real home.  I see candlelight and carpet and am allowed around on my own.  I smell my way through the place, I realize I am completely safe.  

"Owl in the tree, I see you from the window.  I can come in or out and I can roam all about.  I have more than I had before."

The owl's eyes brightened and I could see them through the night.  

His words he spoke with all his might.

"I know.  I see.  I see.  You may be sad at what you've lost and that's okay.  But, it won't take you long to realize what you have gained."

I push my paws from the window sill and walk to the door of the room where the family sat.  I turn back.

"Owl, I  have looked and looked for the one who might see me.  I saw myself in the harbor water and my face wasn't happy.  Then, someone picked me up and took me far away.  And now I see what I have and what I had before.  The difference is a family."

Owl's eyes blinked and his head nodded in agreement. 

 "It is easy to be seen once you learn yourself to see."

I smile at owl, my friend so wise and old.  

I turn and cross the threshold.