Housewives, Hurricanes, and "Hey, Mom."

Desperate Housewives reruns are booming from my daytime tv. And I think it's such a clever show because all the women are intriguing and have these exaggerated personalities that draw us to them like magnets. I adore each of these characters. They are representative of parts of a whole. Most of us have sides. The Susan side, the Gabrielle side, the Bree side and although we may hide it more, the Edie comes out every now and then. I began watching this show way after the rest of American girls. I am so slow when it comes to using sunscreen and watching shows. Nevertheless, I am watching now and making up for lost time.

Today, I am Bree. Why? Because I have cleaned my already clean Arte Italica serving pieces, done four loads of laundry, cleaned appliances, wiped all glass and mirror in house, done the dishes, made the bed, watched a movie and sent it back, gathered all necessary items needed to withstand possible long periods of no power from hurricane Earl, and gotten my friend’s keys that is headed to Chicago in case her house needs care after the storm. I’ve walked the dogs, twice. I’ve gotten the mail, cleaned Selma’s ears and brushed both dogs’ teeth, made dinner for two nights in case we can’t heat food from storm damage, and have even filled the bathtub in case there is no water for days and we need bath water (friend’s suggestion). I am about to vacuum and work out. Before I can brag about my Bree-ness, I must declare, I have had coffee. Lots and lots of coffee. Oh yeh, I couldn’t have been Bree without having a great lunch, and it just so happens I had a fresh bowl of organic greens and spinach with toasted pecans, blue cheese, blueberries, and toasted Quorn patties cut into strips with a wonderful balsamic vinaigrette. As much as I would like to be cute and clumsy Susan, there is no time for that with a hurricane nearing. And of all of them, Gabby is the most fun to watch I think. No sexy hotness here either, just ponytails and storm candles. Anywaaaay… none of that matters. I am simply letting the coffee take its course and using the keyboard to hurry the process.

Yesterday, I stated that I would share an email conversation between my mom and me. It’s below, but I will tell you that I can’t make my mom stop being over complimentary. She just can’t help it. She is m-o-m. All mom. And, it may be nauseating to you, but keep in mind, she loves my guts. I switched the order so it reads like it was sent instead of backward. Here t’is…

ME:Hey mom,

I wrote these things.

~For a dream journal I got for a friend as a thanks-for-having-us-gift:

"Dreams and feeling free are intertwined in the mind. They show us that it is self, not circumstance, that determines our truth, hope, and ultimately, our freedom."

~Before bed one night... don't know when exactly... like a week and a half ago? Wrote this:

The seven winds of change came and danced across my wrists.

In the caress they told me a secret that shall never escape my lips.

If you meet the seven winds, you'll be more than pleased.

It's of the glories and of the stories the winds gather from the seas.

~Just a few secs ago, wrote this (Haven't read it back to myself yet.):

Can we wonder while we sleep?

Do we pray a little with every weep?

When mind creeps

I'll let mine leap

Across that gray divide.

Faster please, oh keeper of time.

I want to know and no longer hide

From the truth that spans so far and wide.

Release my captured, colorless soul.

Within, it can stay contained no more.

To roam the lands that have lived in lore,

I must pivot- plunge into myself, explore.

What do I find here in whimsy and what nots?

Can't tell or judge my day's tic tock.

I may be free or I may be lost

Or I may be inside my dream of a spot

That seemed so fancy and dandy.

It seemed to be where one could fly free.

Like Luna moths or spray from the sea

This dream of a space may elude me.

Will I leap back and dare to wake up?

Or am I content in this Neverland rut?

I may muster the courage but my spirit is stuck.

In the new found knowledge of matter and muck.

Mind, give me a hand please, won't you?

I see that your showing me lessons of value.

Inside of my self is where I'll continue.

And in self is where light shines on real truth.

Whether that divide holds me from sheer pleasure

Is up to me, it's my space to measure.

And whether it was a dream or it was life pure

I ought to make both experiences to treasure.

Waking, I wiggle, feel foggy and fuzzy.

And all that made sense just before fades quickly.

I must remember that spark of a journey.

Or was it, I ponder, a glimpse of another me?

(I was writing this and what I wrote initially stopped at explore and I just kept writing after I copied and will send the rest to myself too to keep.)

Tell me what you think.

MOM: These are very beautiful and once again amazing. You really need to do something with these. Share them. This last one is likened to your book I think. I think the one about the winds is beautiful and my favorite. You should write a book of poems if nothing else but fill a journal book with them ALL - even out of order, but written down. You will enjoy them in later years and amaze yourself all over again.

ME: It may be applicable to my book, but not written for it. I was thinking about dreams and we all have the same fading experience when waking from them. Not many things revolving around our inner personal experience have such common thread through all of man. So, I was thinking about what that might mean, and then was thinking ultimately, that death might be like waking from a dream. Dreams are always slow when in them, but amazingly short relative to where we are when we wake. Life may be similar compared to the Everafter. And what seems so important and crucial in a dream is suddenly and by large contrast, inconsequential to our awakened point of view. It may be worth addressing or worth pondering, and even worth working out if it wasn't a great one, but never does it really matter that much... just an experience. Life may be viewed similarly... and this is what really interests me. When we wake in the Everafter, painlessly and with relief, we may notice how exaggerated our emotions were about what amounts to no big deal. Life may be a facet of ourselves, just as dreams are. Just part of the big picture... one after the other, until maybe we decide we can take a break from "night". Also, in dreams, they are, like in our world, always from an extreme point of view from Self. This means, although others are in our dream, it is because we place them there and choose more than we realize. Life is also an experience that is lived through only Self's vision and intentions. Never can we escape being selfish because it is our only domain from which we can truly think. If we redefined or even gave a new reputation to the word 'selfish' I think it would impact our world in an extremely positive way. We wouldn't shy away from our wants and needs, and in turn... we would be encouraging of others doing the same and every single soul would focus entirely on what makes them happy... because that is the main desire of most. Happy people are fulfilled and fulfilled people allow others to fulfill themselves and before you know it, the world is enlightened. Dreams are an enormous sign that our soul is giving us. As a whole, the concept of dreams, shows us it is all about what we think and in turn feel that determines our entire reality.

And, one 'day', we may wake up from this life, and think of it as a foggy, fast-paced glimpse of ourselves that we care so much about, but is not in essence who we are, rather a vivid creation of our minds, only part of our enormous soul.

So, that's what I was thinking about before writing that poem. Just the details of dreams, relating dream to life, and death to waking.

Does it strike you the same way?

MOM: OMG I had to read it three times. Did this just come off the top of your head? Did you copy this out of a book? Beth I think I speak for most of us that we don't ponder thoughts like this on a daily basis or maybe ever. Is this the magnitude of thoughts that float around in your head everyday? No wonder you can tune conversation out - you are in constant debate in your mind. You need to be doing something with all this thought and pondering. You are wasting it by not using it or sharing it. It needs to be out there somewhere. Once again - I am speechless. Can you send this to someone that would know where it needs to be?

So, that's what we swapped and it is interesting, don't you think? Do you think about stuff like that too? All sorts of stuff goes down during the night. We dream, we have experiences that we swear are more real than dreams, and we, during all this, rest. Pretty nifty.

Now that I've kept my promise to post, I'm taking off. Mega flashlight needed. Earl is approaching.